Suitcases and Home

For the past three weeks I have been travelling, and despite what most might think the majority of my travelling is spent trying to see my family or do a bahai activity. It makes my head spin, because it’s not the destination itself, but the climate change , the suitcases and the airports. Maybe I am getting too old for this. but whenver I try to slow down I begin to feel itchy and needing to travel somewhere, someplace …
How did I get here? How did I end up with banks in England, checks pending for jobs in Spain and the UNited States, overdrafts in England and credit card stuff due in The United States. How did I end up scattered all over?
I never truly PLANNED to be sort of in four places. But it sort of happened. Somehow, legally I exist in four countries. Which is odd.
I check all my pictures, of all the friends and places I have been and it is all starting to blend together. Am I just a fleeting mirage for those that see me a little at a time?
I love to discover. When I was a kid, I would disappear from the house to go off on my own . I was four. It drove my family mad. It still does. I can’t help but try to find out what is going on in the next corner, to see inside the cosmos…
But I hope that this allows me to not become consumed by individualism… how can I be part of a collective?
I do try to stay put, but things beyond my control uproots me again and again. This time last year, I had to make a tough decision : my family was leaving england so I had to decide where to live. So I decided on Madrid… and boy did i bite off a lot more than i could swallow.


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