So, for some strange unknown reasons I get random marriage proposals wherever I go. I really don’t know why, other than maybe “visa” and “easy target” is stamped on my forehead. No, oh no, it is not even remotely romantic just really incredulously stupidly unbelievable. Yet, it keeps happening. I think I probably emit a vibe or something. Here are some of my all time favorites :
1. Ecuador 2003- Gypsy Clown in Circus
In Otavalo, there wasn’t much entertainment on the year I was there. A sad tiny little circus came to town. The highlight was a goat. The guy came up to me with frost tipped hair sits next to me and tells us to come back after the circus. Invites us into his tent and plays, oh yes… Backstreet boys. He grins at me and says
“You are beautiful… you can be part of the circus and marry me. “
( Thanks… I think?)
This went on for various nights. My friends would crack up. The stories became even more elaborate. I kept saying no.
2. The Fifty Year Old One Legged Cuban Man- Cuba 2002
Varadero Cuba. My best friend and I had overslept and the last tourist bus to get back was gone. We had to trek to the next city called Puerta del Diablo, Or the Devil’s Door to find some way home. We were hoping to get a taxi, but they cost far too much. So we tried to get on the train, but all the tickets had been sold out. My best friend had an exam the next day so he had to come back. As he tried to get around to getting a ticket somehow a man came up to me.
He had one leg , bright smile and coffee colored skin. We talked about the revolution in cuba, of science and all sorts of topics. He told me “Where you from? ” I told him, El Salvador. He told me, “Listen, I have a plot of land in Cienfuegos, we can live off it. Come and marry me and we can arrange something”. I looked at him incredulously and told him “Um… no!” He got serious and said ” Look, I got extra tickets on the train, if you come with me I can get you in “. Let me get this straight… he wants me to marry him for train tickets????
I ran to get my friend , who basically told me I should have played along…we watched him enter the train with a wide smile on his face. Needless to say , we didn’t get on that train but we did manage to get on another that same night. ( Oddly all the trains inside were empty!)
The Green Carders
This hasn’t happened once, or twice but a couple times. One time the guy was a friend , and out of the blue told me he loved me and wanted to marry me. Of course, I knew it was because of a visa because he kept telling me to hurry up … when I confronted him, he basically stopped calling me. That wasn’t so bad as the one time the guy I had previously been in love with implied I marry him for a visa but that “we didn’t have to do anything”
Great. Thanks for that.
The Old Man – The Park, Madrid 2011
It was a nice and sunny day and I sat waiting for my junior youth and some friend to come up. A guy in his seventies came up to me and asked how I was. We had a lovely little conversation and all of a sudden he told me
“Listen, I have this apartment here alone in Getafe. My daughter lives with me, but if I find someone to marry she will move out. You know ( and he inches closer for this one) love doesn’t have age differences “
I took a very long shower after that one.
Those are only some highlights.
Anyone else ever gotten weird marriage proposals? Please tell me I am not the only one!